Sunday, October 11, 2009

Health Watch

While some people have a natural distate for detailed and intimate descriptions of bodily ailments, I'd like to warn those of you with this particular sensitivity to avoid a new segment I'm launching on this blog entitled, "Health Watch." In light of my current medical "situation" I thought it would be entertaining and education, but mostly entertaining to document and track any and all of my travel-related ilnesses. In case it was not clear - I do get quite graphic.

Health Watch - A Welcoming Malady
It has been two days since I first experienced severe abdominal pain. On October 9th around 5:00 AM I awoke to strong stomach pains. As the pain was not completely incapacitating I continued with my day thinking nothing of it. It wasn't until the following day did I see the manifestation of this pain - after both breakfast and dinner my stool was runny and watery. In fact, it had the same sensation as if one were urinating but from a different exit cavity. Let's just say there was an explosion of sorts. Also, it certainly didn't help that for my second bathroom "experience" of the day I was about 3/4 of a mile from the nearest bathroom. As I uncomfortably scurried my way over to the hotel, a popular MAD TV skit came to mind of a truck driver and his daughter. While on the road, the daughter turns to her father and explains her urgent need to defecate, "Daddy..." she says, "'s prairie doggin'!" As I thought about this, I tried to laugh but I only managed to produce a cringed smile as I tried to hold everything in. Soon I began to sweat quite profusely as I dragged my feet across the dirty road as heat and humidity pounded my poor helpless soul. Fortunately, for me and my accompanying peers, my soul made it in time.

Currently on my third of day of stomach pains, I am still experiencing severe cramping. In fact, the cramping has intensified but with greater frequency. However, I did manage to get my hands on some Pepto-Bismol an hour ago. For those of you whom have forgotten the taste of Pepto-Bismol, it tastes like bubble gum that was first liquified and later mixed with plastic and plutonium. With that, I shall end today's blog and later write about the outcome of this particular episode. Until then, I hope to eat without having to think about what it might look or feel like on its way out.

No comments:

Post a Comment